Step One

I lie. Step one does not exist. Not unless you go back to the beginning, and who knows where that is? But step one is that next step you take.

I've been reading a lot of books on organizing, dieting, and spirituality. Sometimes one book covers all three, but perhaps not in the way the author intended. One "takeaway" I've learned (and the term comes from my current boss whom I admire and from whom I learn things every day) is that whatever has come before, you can start again with the next step.

Strayed off your diet by eating a box of girl scout cookies? All it takes is the next step to get back on track. Throw the empty box away and go for a walk. Make yourself a cup of tea. Know that you may have not followed your intentions, but your needs, and figure out what those needs are.

Let the papers and mail pile up on the table so you can't find the placemat on which to set down your breakfast cereal bowl? Stack up the pile neatly, eat your breakfast, and then pick up the first envelope and deal. Is this one paper important? --yes or no.

Snapped at your child or spouse or friend? Take a deep breath and let it out. Apologize for your tone and clarify what you meant with less emotion and more tolerance. For yourself as well as for the other person.

Of course, all this is easier said than done, because in the moment, we can get stuck in our emotional response. If I ate those cookies, made that mess of my unpaid and overdue bills, yelled at another person, I must have been bad. I must *be* bad. I'm a failure.

No, you are not. You are a person. Someone who may need to take a moment to center herself (or himself) by stilling herself on the journey. Pause to take a breath, look around, and get oriented. Not by asking yourself how you managed to fail once again, but to open yourself to the possibility of the future.

I've made a mistake. I have wobbled, but I have not crashed and burned. Because the next step is mine to take, mine to go in whatever direction I choose.

That is how I am living these days. Not exactly "in the moment," but maybe "through the moment." Through the moment of choice, answering the question, "What is the next action I will take along this path?